a judicious use of some light make-up

That the Divine Self-existent, the Exalted One, and Defender of the Faith, the crackhead president bush would deign to offer us mere commoners his Enlightened Wisdom on science education for the children of the unwashed, I see as a hopeful sign.

For too many years now, his All-Seeing Eye was necessarily fixed on foreign shores in a desperate struggle to keep the barbarian hordes from the shores of our beloved Homeland. But now, his God-inspired wisdom has all but defeated those unexpectedly fiesty Iraqi rebels. Why, there’s even talk about bringing some of the troops home as early as next year sometime. A ray of sunshine, finally, down here in the drudge of the lower castes’ daily lifes. Now we can get on with our tasks with lighter hearts, and so be more productive. Knowing that the Anointed One’s concern can again turn to alleviating the burdens of his acolytes, thereby showing again the compassion that must truly reside in his heart, as his high-priests tell us is so, surely must put a song in the hearts of the rest of us. Except, of course, for those who have turned from the Light, and must therefore travel in Darkness and Despair.

Knowing the crushing burdens of modern life on his beloved people weighs heavily upon him, while he wrestles with the siren temptations of the succubi that visit him in the night, whispering doubts and seductions to him, while they gently soothe his troubled brow. And then god, in his mercy, whispers in georgie’s ear, the secret, the key to it all.

When the president bush wakens his resolve is again strong. No more doubts caused by the night time fevers and nightmares, the effects of which are hidden by a judicious use of some light make-up by his handlers. And then, that long awaited day. A happy day. One which the president bush declares that “Intelligent Design” should be taught in his nation’s public schools. No longer will our children be burdened with learning facts and explanations. No more learning how to solve problems, or to even think. Why, even only one book will be necessary. No more heavy backpacks which can hide anything, as we know. The Bible. But only one particular version of that book. All the answers are there. All that’s needed is a blind belief. Oh, how so much easier our lives will be.

Now, I know what some of you are thinking. “How can our children become successful and compete in this new world economy, if they don’t learn things like real science and real math, and real history?” There’s no need to fret. That’s not the purpose that the bushista/corporate cult has for your children. Their purpose is to serve their betters. So, why a need for all that learning stuff?

Think of how much happier they will be when they learn, and accept, their true place in this “Grand Design”. And isn’t that what we want for our children?

Of course, there will always be calls from those in the Darkness outside of His Light that, no, our children deserve better. They need, and deserve, at the least, the same opportunities and choices we had when we were growing up. HA. As if they have anything useful and truthful to say. If they did, they’d be on the TV, and in the newspapers.

Oh. And about all that death and destruction going on in foreign lands, far away? That’s just a bit of “regrettable” collateral damage along the True Path to the Promised Land envisioned by our Dear Leader dreams. Fortunately we can count on the determination of the president bush to guide, with his gentle hand, our faltering feet as we stumble along the obstacles on the path to his Glorious Vision of a ‘christian’ America, all-powerful, and ready to export our Enlightenment to the lost souls throughout the world.